My guest today is the prolific crime writer Wendy H Jones. I meet her at a writers conference a few months ago and was totally inspired by her energy and humour.
Welcome oh great one...
Question 1: Looks like we’re heading for a nuclear apocalypse how would you spend the final days.
Digging a nuclear bunker and working out how I can escape this. Joking apart I’d spend them on one final holiday with family and probably still reading and writing. Probably writing an apocalyptic thriller. I’d also be down on my knees praying. Thinking about this tends to focus the mind and make me work out what is actually important in life.
A thoughtful response.
Question 2: When it comes to writing what are the excuses you use not to sit down and write.
I have a PhD in this. My house is always spotless if I have a deadline, my ironing done, washing up to date, books arranged in order. I’m also a master at surfing the net, looking for flights to obscure places and working out what I can do with my Tesco Clubcard. All those important things that have to be done straight away or the world really will come to an end. See Question 1.
Wendy I think your list is longer than mine!
Question 3: What teacher inspired you a):-laugh in the face of adversity, B) hide in the face of adversity c) or just how to spell it properly?
I need to thank my English teacher Mrs Ferrie for instilling a love of story writing in me. The poor woman certainly taught us how to act in the face of adversity. I’m afraid to say we tormented the poor woman to death, and yet she still carried on teaching us. She’s no longer with us but she certainly inspired me.
English teachers; where would Shakespeare be now if it wasn't for them?
Question 4: What school friend inspired A) you to something bad, b) do something good and, c) give up on the human race (momentarily)
I wasn’t in a group that did anything bad. We were frightfully studious. Unless you count the tricks played on the poor defenceless English teacher of course. I wouldn’t like to say who led that as they are probably in some high-powered job by now and would deny all knowledge. I am still best friends with 2 of my best friends from School. Caroline Wilkes and I met on our first day in primary school and we’re still friends 52 years later. Jackie Jones joined us at age twelve and we are still going strong. They’re there for me through thick and thin and know all my secrets. Er, on second thoughts, what secrets? I’ve just said I was well behaved.
I believe you Wendy.
Question 5: Name three celebrities who get on your tits, wick or something similar?
I don’t pay a lot of attention to celebrities to be honest, so I’d be hard pushed to choose any. The Kardashians collectively annoy me but I’m not sure why. Any celebrity who appears in a reality show is even worse than the norm. Maybe I should write a Cass Claymore Book where she’s on a reality TV show as a secret detective. Now there’s a thought.
Love that idea.
Question 6: Pick the perfect method for torturing people who interrupt you when you are talking.
I write crime books about serial killers, so I know more ways than you can ever imagine. They’d end up in the pages of a book and die a slow death too horrible to imagine. Either that or Eagal, the Hund from Hell, would just smother them.
Smothering is too good for em!
Question 7: What is the most useless, waste of space advice you have been given?
Settle for a steady job and don’t follow your dreams. Luckily, I’ve always ploughed my own furrow and done exactly what I wanted to do. Everyone should follow their dreams. Life’s too short to do otherwise.
Right on sister.
Question 8: You’re God for a day what changes would you make to this planet of ours?
Stop psychopaths going to war with each other, make sure the worlds resources are evenly distributed and make me Prime Minister. I couldn’t do any worse than the current shower in Westminister.
Nice answer.
Question 9: Ok now you are the devil for a day?
Send all reality TV shows, and their occupants, to an especially vile corner of hell. Although, I do realise there are many people who like these, and this is my personal opinion.
I'm not going to argue.
Question 10: What sort of comedy do you find not funny?
Slapstick doesn’t do it for me I’m afraid. I love Rowan Atkinsons humour, but don’t even want to crack a smile at Mr Bean. Odd. I don’t like vulgar humour either, just not my cup of tea. Give me a good old dose of Dad’s Army. Now that’s humour.
I love Dad's Army...always think of them when I order fish and chips-well not always, but us writers are allowed to exaggerate.
Thank you Wendy for you light hearted and thought provoking answers. Good luck with Bertie's Escape in October, and of course your latest book Antiques and Alibis .
Author Bio
Wendy H. Jones is an award-winning Scottish Crime Writer who lives and sets her books in Dundee, Scotland. She is also an International Public Speaker talking about writing and marketing.Killer’s Crew, the first book in her DI Shona McKenzie Mysteries was the Winner of the Books Go Social Book of the Year 2017. The Dagger’s Curse, the first book in her Young Adult mystery series, was a finalist in the Woman Alive Magazine Readers Choice Award 2017. She has signed a publishing contract with Malcolm Down and Sarah Grace Publishing for the first book in a children’s picture book series, based on a true story about a little Buffalo in Scotland. The first, Bertie’s Great Escape will be released late October 2018. When she’s not writing, Wendy spends her time travelling the world. She is also President of the Scottish Association of Writers and co-founder of Crime at the Castle, a Scottish literary festival held at Glamis Castle Scotland
Find out more
Website: http://www.wendyhjones.com
Amazon: http://author.to/WendyHJones
BookBub: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/wendy-h-jones
Twitter: https://twitter.com/WendyHJones
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/wendyhjonesauthor/
Kerrie Noor Is A Comedy, Romance & Sci-Fi Author From Scotland. Explore her recent work on Amazon or contact her for more information.